"What's this? Gook food?" Did he get my butt dirty again?" Stacy tried to look behind her with a frown."I think it's Chinese," I offered, but I probably shouldn't have said anything."I know how to eat with chopsticks," Angie said, smiling at me. "I can teach you if you want." She doesn't know," Stacy giggled. "I'll show you how, Trent." I do, too!" Do not!" My old grandpappy died fighting the Japs," their man said, ignoring his daughters as they started hitting each other with chopsticks. I just used my fork. "Knocked up his best girl on a Sunday, joined the marines on Monday, died at Guadalcanal on a Tuesday." Oh, um ... I'm sorry," I said, for lack of anything better."Wasn't much older than you are now," he continued. "My other grandpa died over there in Korea. Little patch of hell called the Chosin Reservoir, ever heard of it?" No sir." Not too many people have nowadays," he sighed. "My daddy died in Nam. Jane Fonda got him halfway through his second tour." She did?" All I could. I planned proposing to her during our trip to Europe like in Paris, in Versailles in the grand gardens. I hoped to kneel as she sat beside a fountain and give her this." With difficulty I extracted a small purple velvet box from my pocket and opened it. Inside sat a large ruby ringed by diamond chips."It's lovely," said Bess. "So why didn't you?" She ran off with another." How silly of her to refuse such a noble gentleman."I laughed. "If an accountant who loves his job constitutes nobility, well, you must be American." So where is this stupid woman?" Home," I said."Where's that?" Philadelphia." Heart broken in the City of Brotherly Love." She decided on sisterly love," I admitted."Oh, I guess you must have felt a little unmanned." Not really. I realize I'm not the best catch. Not that she was a great beauty, but she seemed to love me and she loved sex. Unfortunately when she found a better tongue, it belonged to another woman." So I take it you enjoy cunnilingus," said Bess, nestling.
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