But I don't believe that would atone for anything. I can't think of killing myself or throwing away my life now. Enishi, I thought about a lot of things in the living hell you made for me. About life, about death... About sin and retribution. And I finally arrived here, at the one truth I can't throw away. I want to protect the people I see here... I want to help those in pain, or who are suffering... And there was one smile I wanted to see. But to do that, I had to defeat my enemies... I had to take lives... not realizing that those I killed were fighting for the same reason. It was my fault, so I'll accept my punishment. But I'll live on, bearing my sins and the sins of those I've killed. More than living, more than that smile, but to keep those lights shining in the world, I'll continue to fight, without taking life! I don't know if the punishment waiting for me is death, as you say, or if it will take some other form, but until I can no longer wield this sword, I will fight! I'll. .. "Damnit Auston do you really have to keep on pinching my ass!" yes" he answered cheekily and laughed "well stop it or I will throw this bucket of water on you, I'm not joking!" I threatened him "that's fine with me, you do know that we are wearing bathers though? I mean we're going to get wet from the horses anyway, you know how they are." He answered "fine, but if you pinch my ass again I will punch you square in the balls!" I laughed evily at my plan"whatever, let's just finish washing our horses so we can get ourselves ready for the race" Auston said and turned around which gave me a chance to check him out for the hundredth time. Auston wasn't as hot as Drew and Alex were but I doubt I would ever find someone that was, but he was still a nice piece of eye candy. I don't think I've seen Alex and Drew for 6 months, the last time being graduation when me and Drew graduated and I moved out my parents house and shared a house and huge piece of land with Auston and his sister.
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