Mel couldn't help herself and had to ask, "Bobby, you don't even know what some of that shit is. Oops, sorry Liz," who just chuckled, "you loaded up your plate like there's no tomorrow." You never know Sweetie, there may not be!" This got me some strange looks."I know there is nothing at this table that can be as bad as some of the things I've eaten in my life – health regulations wouldn't allow it - so it's not a big deal."Which elicited some even stranger looks, a couple scrunched noses on Jessica and Mel, and a quiet "ewwwww" from Mel."Look," I said putting my chopsticks down for a moment. "You have to live every day like it's your last because you never know when it will be. You could leave here tonight and get run over by a bus." The Buddhists have a saying, 'the process of your death begins at your birth. So enjoy life!' and I couldn't agree more." But..." Life is precious, Mel. Ask any man or woman who has been in combat, or seen the results in hospitals or morgues. They'll. That’s better. There, it’s a reasonable fit. I’m a good judge aren’t I? Now the apron. Yes you do. Don’t even think about arguing. Do you want me to get the ball gag again? And the paddle? No? I didn’t think you would. So, put it on. It’s part of the uniform, isn’t it?“That’s better. Now the wig. Oh, hadn’t you seen it? It’s over there. Or did you think that was mine? Silly boy! Put the cap on too. Make sure it’s straight. Good. Well, you’re starting to look the part at least. I think shoulder length hair and bangs suits you. Did you bring some shoes like I asked? Oh heavens, those are quite wrong. You won’t want to be teetering around on those heels! You’ll ruin the carpet and you’ll spend more time worrying about standing up than cleaning. There, use those ones over there. A two inch heel is quite high enough. They’re a bit small? Well that will remind you to bring something more appropriate next time.“All right. That was far too much effort. Still you look presentable, I suppose..
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