” She paused and took a deep breath, “I just had to know what happened and Lisa knew something was wrong because Mike took her home. I’m so sorry.” And I started to cry. I felt her hold me and I just sat there and cried for a while. How could this be true? How could this have been done to me? I didn’t know what to think or how to feel. I felt low and dirty and naive and stupid. “I’m so sorry,” she again said so softly. We sat there quietly for some time. I cried now and then and didn’t want to think about it but couldn’t stop thinking about it. “Maybe it was Billy,” I said, “he gave me the drink.” “I don’t think so,” she replied. Again we sat there in silence. I wanted to believe it was anyone other then my Scott. I looked down at the tennis bracelet and rotated it round my wrist. How could a boy so nice as to get me something like this have done that to me. I touched the pearl hanging from the choker around my neck that I wore every day. That was from his. She had spent a lot oftime with him these past few weeks, organizing fundraisers and conteststo raise the money and, most of all, helping him prepare for this veryspecial night. He looked amazing, she thought, as she watched him walkpast her and to the steps to the stage. But the feeling Susie had wasmore than pride, more that happiness for her friend: she felt a longingfor Ben. She spent many close moments with him recently. She had wornsome of his clothes a couple of times. She'd been alone with him andseen him almost naked. She'd even kissed him twice. And she hadfaithfully kept his most intimate secret.Yes, Susie was in love. There were many strange things about thisfeeling, however. Ben wasn't the tall, muscular type you typically sawin men's magazines and advertisements. He was smallish for a man, andwhile she was a bit tall for a woman, she had noted on more than a fewoccasions that Ben was about the same size and build as she. He didn'thave a beard -- far from.
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