.." Emily replied. "A hormone implant."Stephanie giggled. "Not exactly," she said. "It's more like an ... egg." What?!" Emily cried, her eyes widening with fear. "What kind of an egg?" Uh ... kind of a..." Stephanie waved her hand. "Look, it's not important."Emily was speechless."What is important," Stephanie said, "is the pregnancy only last two days. It's not a real baby, it's just to trick your body." Trick my body?" Emily said quietly."You know, to make you lactate," Stephanie replied. "You need pregnancy hormones to make your titties swell up with milk!" Will I have to ... give birth?" Emily said.Stephanie nodded slowly. "Yeah," she said, "but it's not so bad." She scratched her chin. "I mean, it doesn't feel good ... but it won't tear you or anything." Tear me!?" Emily said, clasping a hand over her crotch. "Oh my god!" Calm down!" Stephanie said. "I said that won't happen." How long do I have?" Emily asked."Well, you got knocked up yesterday morning," Stephanie said. "So you. You could have used them as Frisbees, except they had no rim on them.I took a pair into the kitchen, where she was feeding breakfast to the twins."What's this all about?" I asked.She glanced at the object in my hand."What's that?" asked Chip. "Are those underwear?" In theory," I said."How'd they get like that?" asked Samantha."There must be an underwear gremlin in the house!" exclaimed Valerie. "Sometimes they get in and do things like that. We'll have to hunt him down before he does that to any more underwear!" Mom! There's no such thing as underwear gremlins," scoffed Chip.Valerie pointed the spoon in her hand to the white disk in mine."There's your proof!" she said, waving the spoon."How do you find one?" asked Sam, her breakfast forgotten."No time to talk about that now," I said. "We'll discuss that when you get home from school." I looked at Valerie. "Unless I've already caught the culprit." If you do, I want to see him before you throw him out," said Sam."There's no such thing.
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