Today's fracas was going to cause him a GREAT deal of trouble, so it had to be someone else's fault, and he was laying the blame squarely on my shoulders.I let him rant and rave, hoping it'd just be a short-term letting off of steam. I spent the time thinking about what I should do if it was more than just steam. I didn't want a war with the Principal, and I certainly didn't want to declare one unnecessarily, but I definitely didn't like the idea of him declaring war on me and my not defending myself.His rants were mostly hot air, and he didn't actually tell me I was suspended or expelled, but he did threaten to revoke my special privileges and he said, "If you're involved in one more such incident or commit a single breach of school rules, then you'll be out of here so fast your head will spin."I prefer my head to do as little spinning as possible, and battling the Principal for reinstatement after I'd been expelled would be harder than stopping him expelling me in the first place.. ”You know, it hurts when hot coffee spurts out your nose.A mortician was laying out the body of a man with an unbelievably long penis. He called in his receptionist to show her.She took one look and said, “Big deal. That’s just like my husband’s penis.”“You mean he’s got one that long?” asked the surprised mortician.“No,” she replied. “That dead.”I know you have been laying awake at night wondering why baby diapers have brand names such as “Luvs”, “Huggies,” and “Pampers’, while undergarments for old people are called “Depends”.Well here is the low down on the whole thing... When babies crap in their pants, people are still gonna Luv’em, Hug’em and Pamper’ em. When old people crap in their pants, it “Depends” on who’s in the will!Glad I got that straightened out so you can rest your mind.The old man placed an order for one hamburger, French fries, and a drink.He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front of his wife.He then carefully counted.
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