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‘You told me that I’d know when you were ready to make love, as you’d be naked,’ I reminded her. She smiled, but said nothing, holding my eye. I squeezed her fingers. ‘Okay, dammit. Yes, I’ll go with you.’ ‘We were going to the beach anyway,’ she said, ‘and I think the beach at Dover Point might be quieter.’ ‘I wonder why?’ I said, grinning at her. ‘Come on, before I lose my nerve.’ It was about a fifteen minute drive, and when we got there, the parking lot was about half full. Maybe because it was a Friday. I suspected there’d be more if it was a weekend. We grabbed our bags and headed for reception. The girl behind the desk was bright and cheerful, modest in bikini top and shorts. A concession to the interface between the two worlds, I guessed. ‘Hi, folks. Come for the free admission for couples today?’ she said with a welcoming smile. I took a breath. ‘Yep.’ ‘First time?’ I nodded. ‘Don’t worry. After ten minutes it will all seem natural. Unless you meet someone you know, of. How’re you doing?” The question was a familiar prelude to our many telephone conversations. “Great now,” I smiled into the phone. It was a luxury being able to talk on the phone in the evenings, but he was on a business trip and my husband was at one of his eternal meetings, so we had a bit more freedom than usual. “It’s so nice to hear your voice.” We never wondered why we bothered through all the restrictions of having an affair. The answer was there in our connection, in the pleasure we did have when we could speak, in the flutters in our stomachs when we could hear one another’s voices, and in the most exciting cyber-sex possible. It wasn’t all about sex either. We were real friends and would be as likely to end up discussing philosophy or sociology as having cyber-sex. Both of us felt a deep sense of loss that we lived on different continents and had never met, but our connection was intense and continued to grow despite that. “I’m missing you,” he continued. The husky intensity.
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