College Girl Masturbating Secretly Recording

The past is all I can think about; it’s all around me.Her brother, who is also my best friend, married the girl he’s been with since freshman year of high school. All of our old friends are here, mostly married with children. It’s like I’m having one of those dreams that don’t make sense with people you used to know in starring roles, doing and saying bizarre things that don’t quite match up with the fading memories of them in your head.A girl—Lexi? Alexis? whatever—I used to fuck back in the day walks in with her husband. She used to do a tremendous amount of coke. She probably shouldn’t even be alive. She comes over and talks to me using big words in not the quite right ways, and Alexis’s husband stands next to her proudly.I get away from them as soon as I can and look back at her.I stare at her, her gaze touching everyone but me. I wish I could have a fraction of her composure. I hate her fucking ambivalence more than I hate being at this fucking wedding. So I decide to be a dick.. Becky certainly knew it and had taken full advantage of it at the conference in Cincinnati. Stephie had recognized it early on and had seen it as a way to perhaps maneuver Kara out of the way. Sofia surely knew it, coming to stay with me at the hotel when I’d been in Sweden. I had, at times, acknowledged the situation, but now I needed to not only acknowledge it, but to understand it and deal with it. If I didn’t, I’d fall right into a relationship for which I wasn’t ready and one which could cause big problems down the road.In a way, I was lucky at how things had turned out with Stephie. It wasn’t ‘sour grapes’; it was the recognition that I’d become involved with her because I was needy. I needed someone with me - a constant companion, a lover, and a friend. Sometimes that was a single person, sometimes it was multiple people. It was going to be difficult to achieve if I didn’t have a girlfriend. I wondered how my relationship with Stephie would work once she came back to Chicago.I.
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