That and her way with subtle innuendos that keep me guessing whether I’m mistaking something innocent or being enticed toward something far from it. One slow Saturday afternoon I checked out a book on medieval philosophy and hovered near, chatting a bit as there was no one behind me. “Did you see that woman with the t-shirt that says, ‘Come over to the dark side—we have cookies’?”She had. “I didn’t think you were a fan of the dark side,” Lorraine said. “Anything for cookies,” I said. “Oh,” she said, disappointed. “I have a dark side too but I’ve learned not to let it out.”She studied me for a second. “Maybe that’s a lesson you should un-learn.”Taken aback a bit, but excited, I said, “How might a nice young man do that?”“I’ve tutored one or two in my day," she said.Another patron approached and I moved away but I couldn’t leave the library then. I went back to the computer section, made a reservation, and logged in, found tribe. Within a few minutes, I was looking at naughty. "Of course Miss" he smiled, assuring me that he would get to the bottom of this, and walked out the door. I watched him through the window for a few minutes but soon sat on my couch again, waiting for a response.After about 5 minutes of investigation, he returned through the door. "Nothing but a few raccoons Miss" he smiled. I giggled innocently."I see....." My speech was interrupted as Officer Bigdick seemed to spring into action. He crept across my living room, looking upstairs."What is it?" I whispered nervously."I here something..." he sprinted upstairs silently. I followed him as fast as he could only to find him at the end of my upstairs hallway, staring into my bedroom. I walked over behind him only to find my vibrator lying on my bed with the cheesy porno still playing on my TV."Oh...!" I gasped as I ran to the TV, shutting it off and then tossing my vibe under the bed. I looked up to him with embarrassment and he just stood there, grinning."Relax, I've seen much.
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