I suppose she might havebeen having her own flashbacks - to whatever she'd done in a previouslife to warrant being in bed with me. More perfectly, uniquelyindividual punishments for us."Do you think we're doing good, even as horrid as it is for us?" sheasked."Bad men get made into women to be abused by bad men who, I hope, inturn are made into women to be abused and so on and so on. How many ofthe bastards are there?"Too many.Purity went down to make coffee while I was tying up my hair ready for ashower when I heard her calling my name. An edge of urgency in her voiceI'd never heard before had me hurrying down to see what the emergencycould be.I found her alone in the kitchen, back pressed to the cooker while shenodded to a plain, manila envelope on the table. A yellow post-it notewas stark upon it and even from the doorway I could see Chelsea Hollandwas written on it in pencil."I keep hoping for one with my name on," she said. Her voice wasfragile, brimming with tears."What?" I. ..I was afraid you weren't going to show.' blah, blah blah blah then he said 'I actually just got checked in to my motel, why don;t you just come over here and we can ride to the restaurant together?'. Again, me being the push over that I am was like, 'oh, ok, where is the hotel?' He told me where he was staying and when I found the hotel....I almost turned around. It was cheap and dirty, and had the live in motel people were standing all around looking at me drive up. I think I started to have a little panic attack. it was hard to breathe and I started thinking about just turning around and leaving. but before I had a chance to even consider it, he said over the phone 'There you are, come straight on back, I'm up on the second floor.' And he was, waving at me. I pulled down and parked near his room, and asked him if he wanted me to drive, and he said 'naah, come on up for a few minutes while I finish getting ready.' Me being me...I just said'....ummmmm, ok, I'll be up.
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