My wife told her how I cried when she asked me to give up my books. My daughter told her that she’s moving too fast and she needs to give me time to get settled. I’m going “oh fuck! this is me they’re talking about.” After a while they quit talking and decided they needed to “wake me up” as my daughter had some where to go. I got to hold my grandson again while she was getting ready. My wife was playing with our grandaughter in another part of the house. I held him as tears streamed down my face. I realized how much of his life I’m going to miss.I’ve had a trip planned for several months and it looks like it will be canceled due to the seizures. I’m not safe for driving the amount of time necessary to get there. It’s a festival that’s only held every two years. My daughter is going to see if she can take us. That’s another reason I’m upset. I’ve really looked forward to this and if I don’t go this time I don’t think it’s reasonable to expect that I’ll be in a condition to go next. He said he wanted me to be with my family, not to have them gathered at my gravesite. Honestly, though, stopping in the parking lot at Walmart in Elkhart, Indiana for the night when it was only five p.m. was a pain. I didn’t bother trying to camp on the way out. I just cranked the passenger seat back and slept. Of course, the fact that the store was open 24 hours meant that people were driving in and out of the parking lot all night long, and three huge campers pulled up near me to spend the night as well.I was out of there at six the next morning, but the day went a lot slower. I kept having to pull off to get coffee and burgers to keep me fueled. It was no farther to Syracuse, New York than I drove on Monday, but I didn’t pull in until seven that night. Half the time I was driving, I had my phone connected to the Bluetooth system in the car and was talking to my loves. They kept me awake, at least. I know that technically it took more than the ten hours of allotted drive time, but.
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