But I still ain't rooting for those damned Ag students from State College. They have a golf course management degree, for Christ's sake. Who it the fuck needs a four-year degree to push a lawn mower." It takes them 3 years just to figure out how to start it," she said. "You know you have to put down the beer to pull the cord. So, anyway, call Carrie and let me know, OK?"I agreed and called my house. Not surprisingly — since I was driving my car — Carrie was there."Hey, any plans for tonight?" I asked."Oh, yeah," she said. "My ass, your couch, my alma mater on the tube. Sorry, buster, it might only be the Tidy Bowl but when the Bucks play, I watch."Well shit."Don't even tell me you went to Ohio State," I said. "Jesus, Lord have mercy. I should have known that when I found the flaw it would be a fatal one. By the way, your chestnuts are going to get roasted tonight — by my alma mater." You went to Pitt," Carrie said accusingly."You betcha," I told her."Mother fuck," she said."Well. ”“So why freak out about this? Nobody has coerced anyone or forced anyone. I would never have approached her if she hadn’t said something to Elaine, even if it was just a random thought at first. Finish your pipe and go dance with her. She’s been enjoying her dances with those three young Ensigns who are falling all over themselves to dance with a very pretty Cuban girl! Then invite her to come to lunch.”“And what’s in this for you?”“A stable, happy household.”I shook my head, “No, there’s more to it.”“A happy husband! One who has what he’s been looking for - a long-term, stable third. May I make an observation? One which I will never ever repeat?”“You can say anything you want, Honey.”“It was a mistake to encourage Elyse to be with Eduardo. SHE was your long-term, stable third, and you made a major mistake when you pushed her away.”I took a deep breath, “You have a point. But I thought I was doing what was best for her.”“And do you think that’s still true?”I shook my head, “Not.
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