Every morning Morrel called on Noirtier to receive news of Valentine, and, extraordinary as it seemed, each day found him less uneasy. Certainly, though Valentine still labored under dreadful nervous excitement, she was better; and moreover, Monte Cristo had told him when, half distracted, he had rushed to the count's house, that if she were not dead in two hours she would be saved. Now four days had elapsed, and Valentine still lived.The nervous excitement of which we speak pursued Valentine even in her sleep, or rather in that state of somnolence which succeeded her waking hours; it was then, in the silence of night, in the dim light shed from the alabaster lamp on the chimney-piece, that she saw the shadows pass and repass which hover over the bed of sickness, and fan the fever with their trembling wings. First she fancied she saw her stepmother threatening her, then Morrel stretched his arms towards her; sometimes mere strangers, like the Count of Monte Cristo came to visit her;. ### I opened my eyes. She was standing in the doorway, looking down at me, a little smile on her face. I must have passed out. Laying on my back, my legs spread wide, two fingers were still halfway inside me. I noticed her nipples were hard. I hoped I’d pleased her. I looked at the towel hanging near the door, thought about pulling it over me, embarrassed that she could see every inch of me, and my body was nothing compared to hers. But I couldn’t move. “Are you okay?” she asked. I nodded. “Then wash your hands, and we’ll finish watching the movie.” I nodded again, hoping I could get up soon. When I finally did, I put my clothes back on, and walked into the living room on shaky legs. The lust was gone, now it was all embarrassment, soul crushing and complete. I felt raw, like three layers of skin had been peeled off. I really needed to move out, I couldn’t have her able to make me do anything. Christ, why had I just done that? I sat on the end of the couch as far away from her.
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