I'm going to write more about it in another chapter because it's quite complicated and interesting at the same time -- at least I think it is. It's definitely not the kind of relationship I ever pictured myself in. I hope you're not getting bored. Well let’s get something steamy going, shall we? How about I'll tell you about my very first masturbation experience? I was just over 16 when I started to explore myself. I was quite shy back then. I was getting a lot of attention from boys but the problem was I didn't really feel any attraction to them. I knew some basic things about sex and masturbation, and I was getting really curious how it all felt. I was also kind of afraid. Afraid of what, you ask? I dunno. I was silly. Anyway, I had this friend who was a year older than me. We were pretty close and she was really into boys. She stared dating quite early. She was very beautiful, so she had no problems with finding a guy but she never did anything with any of them, not yet. The. "He sensed I was reluctant and studied my concernedly."Don't you want to talk about it?" Not really," I replied, "I lied just now. There are somecomplications." His expression softened as he spoke softly."It's best to talk. Troubles shared, are troubles halved. I can helpyou, you know that." I can't. I just can't talk about it. Not now anyway."He reached towards me and gave me a hug as he whispered. "I won't talk to anybody about it. I know what it means to be betrayed.Just look at me. Before I met my wife, my life as a tranny was hell. Iknow all about betrayal and ridicule. This club- it's my salvation aswell as my business. Where would I be without this -and you?"I knew Jack was right. His club -our club now shone like a beacon ofsanctuary to all that found their lives unbearable. I knew Jack to bethe very soul of discretion but this- this pregnancy of mine. How couldI tell anybody about it? Worse still how could I explain that I wantedto have my pups. I would be certified insane.
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