" Gary started, but then broke up. His face fell apart and he collapsed into my Mother's arms."I'm sorry Rose. God forgive me, I'm sorry." My Mom broke down, then my Dad and the three of them were hugging and crying. It happened before I could react. There I was, feeling very much the outsider, just as one might when attending such a function having never met the principals involved. I was empty. They had loved me after all, but somehow I had missed it. I had tuned my back on that love and I had missed it.The members of the band were milling around on the steps of the church and my first impulse was to hide so they wouldn't recognize me. Then, reality set in and I was able to get over the idea that someone would see who I really was."Come into the church and sit with us Gary, you and your girlfriend." She smiled at me. "You won't get in otherwise. You are as much of a member of our family as Erin and Mike are ... were... Oh Gary," she shrieked and was crying again.I couldn't stand it. . ... and I met a girl who was dressed like an egg. One thing led to another and the lifelong question was answered: it was the chicken.What’s a 6.9?Another good thing screwed up by a period.What’s the difference between your dick and a bonus check?Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus.Two deer were leaving a gay bar...One turned to the other and said, “Man, I can’t believe I blew thirty bucks in there!”What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?A man will actually search for a golf ball.What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?You can unscrew a lightbulb.What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?We’re closed. Beat it.How do you embarrass an archaeologist?Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it comes from.I took a poop in the elevator. I’m taking this shit to a whole new level.What do you call a deaf gynecologist?A lip reader.What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?Beef strokin’ off.Why do vegans give better.
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