“Hello,” announced my introduction. “Hi.” “Would you like to chat,” I asked hoping she’d say yes. When she agreed, although saying that neither of us could show our faces for privacy reasons, we spent the next twenty minutes having a general chinwag about anything and it was during this time that we seemed to be getting a little more risqué with each passing moment. At one point she let me into a little secret that since the death of her husband, due to his accident at work, she’d longed to have sex again but with the situation at home being a major factor then the chances of anything happening were somewhat limited. “Is that why you use a chatroom,” I asked. “So that you might be able to find a soul‑mate?” “Yes,” she answered. “So,” I started. “What kind of things are you looking for?” “If I like the man I’m talking to,” she wickedly stated. “And I’m feeling extremely horny; then maybe we usually come to some arrangement.” “Like what?” “To start with,” she said.. I learned how tokeep my hair and that I would wear a blonde wig until I could grow outmy hair naturally. I learned how I was expected to dress, that alongwith my new underwear I was expected to skirts and blouses to go with mynew shoes. I was told that I would always wear my heels, even to bed, sothat I would learn how to walk in them properly.As the videos went into how I should act around men, I realized that Iwas being taken back to my years in high school. When John bullied me,my only defense was to shrink into a shell. I avoided eye contacteveryone one and tried to be as invisible as possible. Now I could seethat I was expected to revert back to my old coping mechanisms. When aman approaches me, I am expected to lower my head and wait to beacknowledged. I have to call him Sir and thank him for any suggestionor order that he gives me. Even though I was a Vice President, myprimary concern was the comfort of the other members of the executive,and that in these matters I was.
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