I won't feel bad doing those things with you. Please don't turn me down."I'm ashamed to admit that I caved in to her. We spent about an hour and a half in my bed, showered, then went out shopping together. It didn't take too long to spend four hundred dollars, even at a discount clothing chain. Back at my condo, Maria insisted that we spend another hour or so in my bed. She was talented, though not even close to matching Carla's skills in that area. I drove her home after, even helping her carry up some of her new clothes to the front door.I felt bad about having been so weak with Maria. When she phoned me, a few days later, I told her that she didn't owe me anything more, that her debt was fully paid.Teresa called me again, about ten days after that somewhat sordid episode with Maria."What the hell, Frank? You give Gina and Maria what they asked for, and just turned me down flat, without giving it any thought?" You're right Teresa. I should have turned all of you down. Books for. I didn't necessarily think that all the women who appeared in those films were Ruined for Life, or that they were whores. I didn't regard them as in any way disqualified from polite society.No. My "problem" with Shirley's being in porno films was a lot more personal than that. I didn't want to compete with the guys who starred in those movies. I'd seen them in action, and I -- quite literally -- didn't "measure up."And even if size doesn't matter (and, like most guys, I secretly figured that it probably really does matter -- and maybe quite a lot) -- even if size didn't matter, there was the whole other problem of who Shirley Kiner was, today. I knew that if, yesterday, she'd been a porn actress, that had to have some impact on who she was, today.Probably, a negative impact. She certainly didn't look hard-bitten or used up, but how worn might she be, inside, where it didn't show?So, OK. I guess I had multiple problems with the possibility of Shirley Kiner, porn star.Next morning --.
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