He was called by the name he had been given in school, Annie, and made towalk and talk like a girl. Under his shameful overalls he had to wearpanties and training bras. They made him apply lip gloss, like he hadbeen made to do before, and touch it up several times a day. He was alaughingstock with no hope of improving his situation. The departmenthead, Ms. Richards, assured him that if he quit, she would give him a badrecommendation and prevent him from getting hired anywhere else. Thatwent on for a year, with him having to clean the women's lavatoriesdaily. The girls would follow him in and make him put discarded tamponsdown the front of his panties.Then one of his former classmates remembered the idea they'd had, tomarry him off to one of them so that he could be dominated at home everynight. They checked with everyone who still lived in the area and foundthe perfect candidate. It was Brianna, who had transferred in duringAnson's last year. She had joined their cruel games. I ached for more, from my life, my work. The adventure began with relocating to London, to study and make new friends, to learn and make mistakes...but to explore sexuality was nowhere in the plot. I was introduced to a free-spirited Balkan dancer at an English pub at Islington. We got on famously, and among other things, discussed The English Patient. We flirted, and next thing I recall was saying yes to: ‘Can we meet for coffee?’.In the book of life, is there a chapter on chemistry between two same-sex people, and how does one decode it? I was trailing breadcrumbs—started with rummaging through memories of my past. As a 12-year-old, was my attraction to my best friend’s mother (who looked like Brooke Shields!) sexual? I began questioning my long-term relationship with my boyfriend, my carnal choices, my parents, my girlfriends—it was all too explosive, and coming to terms with it in an alien country, a precarious thought. For me, sexuality is a private orientation, but it also.
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