‘When Johnny comes marching home again, Hurrah, Hurrah, We’ll give him a hearty welcome then, Hurrah, Hurrah, The men will cheer, the boys will shout, The ladies, they will all turn out, And we’ll all feel gay, When Johnny comes marching home.’ Everyone was waiting for him to be discharged from the hospital. Only, gone, gone, gone, he was gone from the hospital. Ten days after he had awakened from his coma, he was gone. Discharged without him having a place to live, he was given a new crutch, some clean clothes, and a small bag of medication and sundry medical supplies. Instead of fitting him with a new leg, a new arm, a glass eye, and helping him with his hearing loss, they allowed him to leave without being a whole man again. In the way that the CIA abandoned him in his time of need, so didn’t the United States government and the Veterans’ Administration. Even though he was a real, live, war hero, they treated him as if he was nothing more than a homeless, drunken bum. How dare. Throwing caution to the wind – as I did not like being rejected – I ran up to her I said, ‘I must apologize for dropping those weights. It was simply that you startled me. I’m just glad I didn’t drop them on your foot.’ ‘Well, you came awfully close,’ she replied. ‘You should be more careful.’ Then she paused, eyeing me as if to see if I was a jerk. It seemed that this had happened often. ‘And the way you – and almost everyone stares at me in there – I find it hard to believe that I’d startle you!’ she finally said, daring me to come back with some snide comment about her body. Fortunately for me, I managed to bite my tongue. Maybe it was because the jacket was partly unzipped, but quite large, it was really hard to know what was jacket and what was her. So, forgetting for a moment that she was a one-in-a-million woman, I managed to stay away from anything to do with her body and said in my most deep, manly, mocking voice, ‘Well, uh, we men, you know, we hunt to provide nourishment.
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