I'm not an asshole; I'm not good enough to be an asshole.As soon as most everybody's inside, I smoke another cigarette less because I want one and more because it gives me something to do with my hands other than punch a wall. Maybe all those bruises were me. Maybe it's always been me beatin' up on her an' I've been too blind or stupid ta notice.The bell rings but I haven't finished my smoke so I don't move. When I do finish, I consider going to class and instead light another one. I wish I had something stronger than cigarettes. No wonder Peter popped my shoulder out. He shoulda beat my ass. He shoulda told me what I'd done and beat my ass for doin' it.Eventually, Peter finds me. I pin him to the wall - only because he wasn't expecting it, "Why the fuck didn't you tell me?" Because I haven't seen you all goddamned day! Shit! Back off, Alex!"I let him go; it's not Peter I'm mad at anyways. I start down the stairs."Where are you going?" he yells after me.I have no idea, "Who the fuck. I on the other hand am very content with how life is at the moment. Harvey is happy, Edvard is happy and because of that I am happy, Anyway enough of the happy family stuff.Yesterday I did something I thought I would never manage or ever have the courage to do. I went to go visit my brother in prison, When I got out of bed and got myself ready for the day I also got Edvard ready. After I took Edvard to the nannies I made my way to the prison. On my drive their I was so worried I have never visited my brother but truth be told it was Harvey who had convinced me to go see him. Stepping out of my car I was so scared to the extent where I felt at any moment I was going to faint. Going into the prison it was like nothing I had ever experience it was a far cry from the luxury and glamorous life I was accustom to living. I was searched had to empty out all my pockets and place everything into a locker. entering into the visitor centre I took a seat and nervously awaited my brother arrival..
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