As I came back, I once again threw my pen. This time I got down to pick it up and sat down there for about 10 seconds lusting on her fuckable thighs. She saw me ogling her and asked me to get up and sit. I got scared but the thought of fucking her was too great.She asked me suddenly if I have any girlfriend.R – Kapil, do you have a girlfriend?Shocked and said, “I used to have.”R – Why not now?Me – She cheated on me and got into an affair with another guyR – (giggling) I think you like affair making ladies.And after saying so, she laughed out loud. I was shocked but maintained my calm.Me – how long have you been married madam?R – Address me by my name. 3 years.Me – Ok Raji, do you have any kids?R – No, dear. Your sir has no time and to be frank, he is not interested.Me – That’s so sad. I can feel your pain.R – Do you?Me – YesR – How can you feel my pain?Me – Every woman wants kids some of the days and having kids is the one reason to get physical.R – Ok now let me get to the point,. I can't even believe in myself anymore. I've lost the desire to create and bring laughter to others. I can't bring myself to want anything, to hope or even love.I don't deserve love anyway, not even love for myself. I did a horrible thing to someone else and deserve to suffer for it. Coincidentally, I've found a perfect way to do that. Sexual humiliation has become something I am rather good at taking and being used has taken over any of my previous sexual preferences.Finding the men is easy enough, especially when I tell them that I don't care who they are - something that seems mutual to most men nowadays. I don't think I've even asked their names the past few times. Thankfully, they don't mind that.Sometimes there are handsome ones who come along who seem nice enough but I prefer to blindfold them beforehand. Truth be told, I do it because I can't stand the thought of another man that I'm attracted to seeing how ugly I am underneath my clothes. Gratefully, they don't mind that.
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