‘Don’t think,’ he told himself as he stripped down and wrapped the towel around himself. ‘Just relax. Just… be…’ He walked towards the sauna rooms. He stepped inside the last one and felt the steam wash over him like a wave. He sat down on the bench, put the facecloth over his eyes and leaned back, breathing in and out slowly. ‘Just relax,’ he thought. ‘You’re all right… you’re all right…’ He felt the darkness creep up around his field of vision, and for a moment he concentrated on trying to attain peace within, and for a quick moment thought on his friends from high school and university, guys who’d settled, and thought for a moment that it might be worth it not to chase the highest goal, if it meant not knowing what it felt like to lose it. But then he thought further back, to the first time he heard Trish say ‘I love you’, and even though it wasn’t that way now, it was still a happy memory. And then he thought of that first time Veronica had kissed him, and even though it might. Inside the dress, I wore beautiful transparent red colored panty and bra. I didn’t use any lipstick as dad always rubbed it off. I had a little makeup and light perfume. Most of the time when dad talked to me about sex, he expressed that he likes me without makeup and natural.In about half an hour, I was mentally and physically ready to do another sin. I went to the room and dad was lying on his bed in underwear. He had a lot of hair on his chest and had fat on his body. He looked right for his age, 47. I was a bit nervous while walking closer to him. When I got close enough, he grabbed my hand and offered me milk.I said, “Why milk, dad?”He said, “I’ve mixed viagra in it, we can enjoy the whole night.”I resisted and said, “No, dad. We can do without it and don’t worry about doing multiple times. I will make you horny every time you want to do.”I took the glass and kept it on the other side.He said, “You know baby, you are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen and I wish I had.
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