I became a new woman; a new person."Lucy studied the letters and she came to have a newfound respect for her mother, because despite her better judgement, she recognised the same jumbled feelings and emotions within herself.It was here in her mother's familiar handwriting with its bold blue ink, slanting letters and occasional mistake, neatly crossed out. For instance, in one letter, Lucy read:"The pain was worse tonight. I thought I'd go mad, or die, or end up screaming in hell, for I knew that I was at the end of my threshold. Albert says it's part of my training and that I'll grow used to it and accept it. He says that by the end of my year with him I'll experience the mercy of God."But how does he know? The man's a Protestant and he knows nothing of God's will, compassion and mercy. And me: I know that because of my wickedness it won't happen, that I'm damned to the fires of hell where the Devil will lick my quim and roast me forever in my sexual torment, but even so, I try to be. The chance came one fateful day when Jim had to attend an interview for a job some 60 miles away, leaving home at seven o’clock one Friday morning. Paul knew that this was his chance.As Jim pulled out of the drive Paul watched from behind his curtain, took a deep breath and decided to go for it, come what may. He went downstairs and discovered that Julia had not yet got up. Perfect. He made her some tea and three minutes later was knocking at her bedroom door.“Hello?” she called and Paul went in. They looked at each other and neither said a word for at least thirty seconds. Unfortunately that was all the encouragement he needed.Paul ripped back the duvet and there lay Julia in a silky white baby-doll nightie. This was no time for good manners as far as Paul was concerned and he immediately grabbed Julia’s breasts and started to manipulate them.By now Julia had come to her senses and started to shout and struggle. Her shouting alarmed Paul who put one hand over her mouth while.
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