The sword moved away from my exposed neck, and I tensed as the blade landed on my other shoulder.“Arise, Colonel Sir Elijah John Greenaway.” King George IV said, in a lacklustre, bored, tone of voice.I rose from the kneeling stool, bowed, and then took the mandatory fourteen rearward steps away from the throne.I bowed again, turned to my right and approached the Grand Chamberlain, who draped a richly embroidered robe trimmed with ermine around my shoulders.“Welcome to the Most Honourable Military Order of the Bath, Sir Elijah,” he said.He noted the look of stupefaction and bewilderment on my face, and gave a slight smile.“You were a last minute addition to today’s investiture, Sir Elijah. Your bravery, and quick thinking, in saving the life of their Royal Highnesses the Duchess of Kent and the Princess Alexandrina Victoria, had two Royal Dukes demanding you be made a Knight Commander of the Order for the deed, and so here you are.”The thought came to me that had I turned left instead. " As if you ever did. That does feel good, but you are going to hate me." Go right ahead. How you can complain of retaining water, I'll never know." Mystery of the universe. Wait for me." I suppose the foot rub has to start all over." No. But a minute's back rub would be nice." There, now is milady totally satisfied?" No." What is it now? I would like to get to the main event sometime tonight."That's just it. Now I want a kiss." Can't be done; they come in packages of six. Roll over." Easier said than done. Cheaper by the dozen?" Definitely! Mmmm. That's one. Mmmmum. That's two. Mmmum. That's three. Mmmm. That's two." Lost count?" Don't think so. Where do you think I kissed on kiss two?" My right breast." And that's what I said. Mmrrrm. The more of you to kiss ... Ouch. That was my nose, dammit." You kept encouraging him when it was only me!" Well, I'll just have to duck under his punches. Let's see, hmmm..." Ohhh. That is better than a foot rub." One reason that you get foot rubs,.
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