"How long did you suckle me Mom?" she asked."Seven months," Mom answered, smiling happily as she relieved the memory."What about me?" I asked innocently.Blushing, clearly embarrassed by the question, Mom said, "Only three weeks," and as she continued, explaining the reason why she wasn't able to suckle me long, I tuned out, crushed by her response.Finally I sputtered, "But Christ Mom, I needed that milk... I might have gotten sick or not grown right, that's probably why I developed sexually late... , maybe I'm not as smart as I could have been..."As I continued to mutter, the two women started to laugh, thinking I was joking, not comprehending how strangely Mom's confession had affected me. "You look like you did all right honey," Mom started, mussing my hair as she talked. "Sixteen years old, 6' 2", one-eighty, scholarship student, the girls love you, what else could you want?"After not being able to lighten my mood for some minutes they eventually realized I was somehow. What I did know was that I was interested in girls. Or more correctly, I was interested in girls' bodies. I knew it was forbidden and that made it all the more sexy. By age nine or ten I certainly knew about sex. By age twelve my interests and desires had progressed that, in recognition of my late physical development, I was alarmed that the other boys could get off and I couldn't... yet. But by age fourteen or fifteen, the testosterone storm has just started. Riding the up slope of ascendency of my bursting horniness, I was almost besides myself with the proximity of my female cousins.Over the years, I had some sexual contact or another with each of my cousins, but I'd like to tell you of one that I hold as particularly poignant and erotic.Her nick name was Tookey. She was sweet, fair and even tempered. Just a year or so before, she'd been a stick of a little girl who was permitted to wear only her little-girl white underpants when we went to the swimming hole. I retain an image of.
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