I suspect I must have looked like a like a fat man sitting at a dinner table. Hell, I may as well have placed a napkin around my neck and a ordered a German Porter, because today I was having ass-pussy for dinner! I marveled at Gregory’s’ pulsating hairless asshole and suddenly realized that his asshole was not round at all, but vertical just like a girl’s pussy. His asshole really did look like a one inch hairless cunt, but without a clitoris. I leaned forward gripping both his ass checks and brought my face closer and closer, all the while feeling the heat that emanated from his steamy hot fuck hole. The next thing I knew my tongue was licking up and down his crack like a k** afraid to lose even one drop of his melting ice cream. Gregory went ballistic, and his moans sounded somewhere between a cat in heat and a girl that just found the perfect pair of shoes. My tongue eagerly stabbed in and out of his ass-pussy as his hips swayed and bucked. I could not hold out any longer, so I. My next crap could spell disaster.Went out last night and got really wasted.I woke up this morning next to a fat old bird who was snoring and farting ... so, at least I got home OK.The wife's back on the warpath again.She was up for making a home video last night and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control in Athens airport."Nationality?" asks the immigration officer."German," she replies."Occupation?"No, just here for a few days."As the coffin was being lowered into the ground at a Parking Officer's funeral, a voice from inside screams:"I'm not dead, I'm not dead. Let me out!"The Vicar smiles, leans forward, sucking air through his teeth and mutters,"Too late, mate, the paperwork's already done."I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night.Or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.After both suffering from depression for a while, me and the missus were going to commit suicide together yesterday.Strangely enough,.
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