.. but how are you going to get ... get along without me?” I asked, my eyes tearing and my voice cracking. A better question might have been; how was I going to get along without her?My mother didn’t answer. But she reached over and took my hand, holding it gently without saying a word. I was pretty sure she was feeling the same as me.“We’ll get along somehow,” she finally said without conviction. “Let’s take a walk down to the old barn before it gets dark.”The “old barn” was a remnant of a previous owner who worked the property as a horse farm for years until his death. His children parceled the land and sold it in five-acre plots. The old barn was on our property so we often went to sit on bales of hay to watch the sun go down over the mountains. It was a special place for both of us and helped us both heal after Dad left.My mother led me down the back steps toward a well-worn path that twisted through the woods to the barn. I loved the feeling of her warm hand in mine. There was a. For a few real bites of food, he could bugger me as much as he wanted, I like it a lot when done by someone nice who is gentle at first, so I moved to fish it out of his slacks. He wouldn’t even let me get close to him and sternly told me to stand in a specific spot with my arms down at my sides. I needed to do my best not do move, even if his touch did tickle me a little bit. I didn’t expect his light touch on my hips as he gently turned me around as he looked me over. It didn’t make me feel dirty like when other men and boys made me stand in front of them, with my skirt up, so they could grope me.”Each girl told me how he did touch them all over, including spreading up their pink purses and using something in their buttholes. He explained to them that he had to get the full extent of how badly the people beat them and what damage they had on the inside. None of them understood what he meant when he said they were very fortunate to be virgins still. He seemed quite surprised given.
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