I had seen his pictures. At least he had chosen tobe handsome, like almost everyone still bothering the with fleshyexistence. I was lucky he wasn't one of the few who wanted to offendpeople with their presence. The hormonal adjustment made my body respondto his masculine attractiveness, but they hadn't programmed my mind, soI could still feel disgusted by myself.Yet there was a detail that proved he wasn't all atavistic. I had been aman, and my groin still somewhat proved it. My genitals weren't evencompletely dysfunctional: it could swell into half-limpness, just tomock me for my unwanted arousals.Maybe I was an atavist myself, as I found my midway situation horrible.Perhaps after full functional transition I could have worked to create anew female identity for myself. But my owner clearly didn't want that.The thought made me shiver.In a ludicrously primitive gesture, a driver picked me up from thecondo. Of course, he didn't drive himself, but he did pretend he wascrucial to. "I will play with her," I volunteered."You have to play with us," Andie said with a smile.From then on until she got pregnant again, Dawn was first in line every night.After about two months of that Sammy said, "If you don't get pregnant pretty soon you are going to have to start sharing better anyway. I don't like waiting my turn." Well, Miss Stingy, I am pregnant, so there," Dawn announced.We all hugged and kissed her. I wanted to pick her up and dance with her, but I knew my leg wouldn't let me. I tried to look happy and put on a pretty good show, I thought."Alright, spill," Sammy said."What are you talking about?" I asked."You are the reason I take every breath, I know something is bothering you. Spill," she ordered."I am unhappy that I can't dance with you girls. Those times are some of my best memories. It is killing me not to be able to do it anymore," I confessed.They were all hugging me and crying. I hugged them back and told them that I would get over it."I am calling.
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