It just turned into another nightmare for both of us. He tried so hard. It was just like when Mom didn't want to hate me. After Dad went to prison. He just couldn't help it. "I was still breast feeding the twins when he started to lose control sometimes and get mean. He was always sorry afterwards. He knew I was doing the best I could. We should have gotten a divorce. But I was too afraid of being alone and he knew how much I needed him. So we stayed together and it just got worse. "It didn't help when he got laid off and had to go to work for his brother landscaping. It was mostly just mowing lawns. It wasn't enough money. That was when I started selling breast milk. We could still barely afford to eat but it was enough to get us by. It was also one of the things that led to me becoming a surrogate mother." Then she slowly started to talk like a normal, reasonably happy person for the first time that day. "I love having a baby growing inside me. And. I think that Ed was basically a straight guy as far as his sexual orientation went but he liked the fact that, if he couldn't score away from home, a willing mouth and ass was always at home when he wanted it. Ed insisted that I wear at least a garter belt and stockings to bed every night. He said that he liked the way the garter belt "framed my ass" and he liked the way my stockings felt when I would wrap my legs around his waist. So, I would go to sleep in my bed dressed in sexy lingerie and sometimes he would come home and slip into my bed and fuck me. I never knew what nights he was going to do this but it was good sissy training for me to go to bed every night dressed and ready to fuck. Ed's favorite was for me to dress up in a sissy maids outfit, white blouse, short pleated black skirt, white stockings, garter and panty and high heels. When he came home at night, I would serve him drinks while he sat on the couch and watched a game or some porn. After I'd serve him.
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