All I have to do is think about your legs open and showing me that monster beauty that I can love and make love to. It has come early, but I am prepared to deal with this and these feelings for as long as I live. Just the thought of what I’m doing now drives me crazy. When I can look up into your eyes and see the smile on your face, I get really rattled. I know this is the best and no one can know what we feel. It’s like I’m saying prayers for these moments. I dwell on these moments. I wait with unending anticipation for the next time, knowing the next time will be even better than the last time. I learn more each time we’re together. I’m so happy to make you happy. Oh, yes, Daddy, let me suck and lick and suck and lick some more. I love squeezing you, feeling you grow and get a darker red… that spear of Satan… your weapon, your tool. I love licking it. I love being a slave to these feelings, these forbidden feelings, these secret feelings. Drive me crazy, let your smoothness, your. ’ He gazed at her in amazement and hope, realizing that after five years, he’d finally, finally been able to cry over Janice’s death. ‘Her mother and I had divorced over two years prior to her death, and it had nothing to do with her. It was my ex-wife’s cheating that broke up the marriage. Her infidelities made me question my worth as a man and a father, which Janice apparently felt. In my grief, I believed my inability to care for my daughter’s emotional needs meant that I was unworthy of love. I was afraid to start a relationship with you until I could believe myself worthy again. Then I got the message about your new boyfriend. I was devastated, and abandoned any hope of a making a life with you.’ ‘I lived with this terrible guilt for two years, until my brother forced me to go to counseling. Once I began therapy, I realized that I had punished you by not asking for your support. I knew that I had to find a way to apologize. I had to find you and explain why I never wrote back.
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