Knowing them does notlessen the pain." But...." No but, Sophie dear. You have to recognise that forced orunforced, accidental or malicious, just or unjust, pain is pain.Its provenance makes no difference. If anything it could be arguedthat personal, malicious, individual hurt is the easiest to dealwith. Then at least you have a focus for your rage." So you do think I am being selfish?" No Sophie. Just behaving as a human being will. I am not attachinglabels, just trying to help you put things in perspective. Help youthink it through." You want me to accept. That is what these sessions are all about." No. I promise you. I am trying to assuage the hurt and the painyou feel by clearing away emotional cobwebs so that you can seemore clearly the actuality of your situation. If that leads toacceptance, a decision to make the best of it, then so be it. Butit is not the object of these sessions." And have you cleared away Anne's emotional cobwebs too? Helped herso that she accepts?" "That is. We started exchanging places under the shower and I lent him my soap, we didn’t talk much just some chatting about the weather, and that the day was good, as he was using the soap he asked me to rub soap on his back, so I did. After that he offered to do the same and said I still have some tanning oil on my back so I said ok, and thanked him, as he started to rub my back he started to rub slowly as he moved down my back reaching my buttocks, he even got slower rubbing my butt cheeks one cheek at a time. It seemed strange but I was too polite and to shy to tell him to stop as I was neither enjoying nor that annoyed to tell him to stop. And then something awkward happened, he moved his soapy hand around my thighs and he held my penis and balls in his hand, my eyes got widen, my body got stiffed and I was about to scream when he squeezed my balls and penis in his big hand gently but firmly that rather than screaming I let a sigh and suddenly the stiffens was gone and my eyes closed, he.
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