I'll swear I can feed stock, and you can say that after Buck, a cripple is still an improvement."The sheriff thought to take a horse with him. Curt was tied over a saddle when he returned. Talking to Ada, he figured that her husband was robbed and killed. The deputy had scouted around and found my dead horse and saddle and surmised whoever had ridden him had done the killing. I overheard all of this and I was thankful that neither the horse nor the saddle could be traced to me.There was no mention of the Downs' riders, so I guess Hal had been there at the water hole after I was. This was confirmed when Hal Downs rode into the yard looking for the sheriff, claiming that Curt must have made off with his cattle money. Feigning shock over seeing Curt tied over the saddle, he immediately offered help to Ada.It was a wrong move on his part. Ada lit into Hal. "Goddamn you Hal, I would still have Curt if you hadn't insisted he drive your cattle up the trail with ours. I don't want to see. Iwas thinking about the short term instead of the long term. I wasthinking about the thrills of breaking taboos instead of being happy andproductive on an everyday basis.I was now seeing the big picture. This wasn't about me being "like" awoman. This was about me becoming a complete woman for real and I wasplaying for keeps. I felt completely overwhelmed, but at the same timehopeful and happy, even though I was scared to death at the same time."Do the both of you understand what I'm saying?" Dr. Girardi asked.My mother and I both nodded."That's good," Dr. Girardi said. "That means I can take off mypsychiatrist hat and put on my medical doctor's hat. We need to come upwith a solution that will allow Nancy to become the woman she needs tobe without the female hormones starting a war over her smoking. Which Istill don't approve of, but so be it."I've given this a lot of thought and I think it would be in Nancy'sbest interest if we scheduled an orchiectomy as soon as possible. .
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