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”The Boy Scout just smiles. “Don’t worry, Your Holiness. The world’s smartest man just jumped out of the plane wearing my backpack!”The following items are compliments of J & B.After the brief Falkland Islands war, a British regiment commander was addressing some troops under his command who had heroically performed above and beyond the call of duty. He informed them that Her Majesty’s Army had committed to reward each of the three soldiers 100 pounds per inch of distance between two different parts of the man’s body.The commander addressed the first soldier, “Where would you like to be measured, Sergeant?”“From the tip of me head to the soles of me feet, Sir!”, he replied.“Very good!”, the commander said, and the sergeant was measured at 6’5”. He was paid the handsome sum of 7000 pounds.The second soldier was asked, “What about you, Corporal?”“Between the tips of the fingers of me outstretched arms, Sir!”, the corporal said.“Very good!”, replied the commander. The corporal, a man of. After he went to the toilet, where it was not very clean, he decided to sit on a bench in the shade. For this he had to walk a little further to the edge of the forest, because the benches at the front of the rest area were all in the blazing sun. He also found a bench that was a bit offside, half covered by bushes. Since there was nobody else on the car park except him and a few trucks, he opened his shorts a little and played around with himself. He was so busy with himself, that he didn't even notice two truckers coming out of the forest behind him. "Well, what have we got here", at the sound of the words he shrank terribly and quickly grabbed his semi-rigid tail."You don't need to hide it, we've seen it all," said one of the truckers, a bear of a man. His colleague was a bit smaller but still an imposing figure. "Let's have a look," he said now. But he didn't want to do that and set off back to his truck.The first of the two said, "You stayed right there, boy," and it was amazing.
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