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I was ready for her to conclude the examination, when the next words she said hit me like a bomb: "I'm going to give you a rectal examination." I couldn't believe the words that had come out of her mouth. I'd never had a rectal exam before, nor had I ever had anything inserted in my anus, so this suprised me completely. My stomach started sinking, but Dr. Baumer, knowing from experience that patients are apprehensive about such a proceedure, started to explain it in a reassuring manner. She told me it would only take 10 or 15 seconds and instructed me to get on my side and curl up in a fetal position. I was facing the wall with my naked bum facing her. Not being able to see her, I felt very exposed, but I tried to calm my mind and relax. She put a glove on, lubed it up, and said "OK, this is going to feel a little bit like you have to go to bathroom." Before my mind could wrap itself around that strange sentence, I felt her push inside me, and it did indeed feel like I had to go to. Jessica skewered him. "His or mine?"We left that place."Still no ring," I said."These people are crazy, Barry. The dude just basically said for you to spend sixteen K on a ring." I've heard the 'two months salary' thing before." No." No?" Absolutely not." But..." I started."I'm rethinking this. 'Engagement ring'. Are we engaged?" she asked as we got back in the car."Yeah." So it's a terminal condition of limited duration, right?" That's one way of putting it. Yes," I agreed."And when you marry me, we'll have wedding bands, right?" I would suppose. You get a set, the engagement ring and the matching wedding ring..." I despise that gaudy shit, Barry. Mom's got a ring on damn near every finger..." But you said..." Reality clarified my thinking." That fast? I mean, there are some that don't cost an arm and a leg." Barry," she said, placing her hand on my arm as I drove, "We sort of agreed we're getting married, right?" Yes." Do you envision a long engagement?" Not really. What kind of.
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