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Much better than I am.“Ultimately, I think Jennifer has come to the same conclusion. She knows I love you. She knows you love me and want to make love with me. She knows you want a long-term relationship with me. So does she. She’s convinced though, that if she tells me to stop seeing you, then I would forever wonder what might be, forever wonder if I had missed an opportunity and that could destroy our relationship. In the end, it’s up to you. I can’t commit in the way you want. I can’t promise anything. So the question remains. What do you want? What do you expect?”“I want you, Steve. Right now. No hesitation on my part. Without any promises from you except that you’ll make me feel good; that you’ll love me. I’ll deal with whatever happens after that.”“Are you really sure that’s what you want?”“Oh God, yes! Please! I need you. I can’t stand it. I want to do everything. I want to feel everything.”I hoped that the sense of doom that had enveloped me all weekend was related to the. I longed to really feel it, but knew I probably never would. So I continued to imagine her and stroke myself. God, it seemed so real. It felt so real. I could almost feel her, smell her. I kept imagining and stroking. Two lovers engrossed in each other, inflamed with desire. Kissing. Fondling. Joined as one, copulating. Finally I imagined her in sweet orgasm, clamping down on me. I could feel her arms around me. I could hear her moan my name. ‘Oh John. Oh dear, sweet John.’ Then I exploded. God it was intense. It was almost as if it were real. Teresa and me. Joined in sweet ecstasy. I fell asleep and the rest of the night was filled with sweet dreams of the two of us together. The next morning I was awakened by the phone. ‘Hello John.’ Before she could tell me who it was I recognized her voice. It was Teresa. ‘Are you ready to go to work?’ I looked at the clock. 8:00. ‘Shit’ I thought. ‘She’s gonna be a hard task master.’ ‘Sure’ I said. ‘I haven’t had breakfast yet, would you care.
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