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Can I help you make it, please?” queried Claire.“If it’s all right with your boyfriend, it’s OK with me, Claire,” mom said with a smirk.Claire looked at me like a puppy looks at its momma and said, “Please X,” she whispered to me, “Ti Amo, Carlo.”“Of course, you can help her make the pizza, whatever you want — I want, CC.”Wrapped around her little finger!“Awww — isn’t he the sweetest boyfriend, ever?” Claire said.My mother finished the moment by saying, “The Absotively, Posilutely, bestest, nicest, sweetest boyfriend in the history of boyfriends, Claire.”I believe she was mocking me.They both laughed heartily at Annie’s remark. All I could do was stand there, blushing like an idiot. I do that particularly well.“Call and leave the message, CC — then we will practice the Viennese Waltz. Maybe we could even look at the Samba, Rhumba, Jive or Paso Doble? Mom — why don’t you pick the next dance we learn?”“I’m going to call, be right back,” Claire said.“Mom. What do you say?” I. I called him when I had my front door opened."Why are you being such a dick, Rick? Can't you listen to what I've asked and just do what I've told you I want?" Tell me about the bet. You made one with her, right?" You've got to keep this to yourself, man. We made a bet. I lost. I'm going to do her windows, and then it's all over. Nothing else. It wasn't like you're fantasizing either. If I won, she was going to do my windows." My bull shit detector just got pegged to the max, Denny. I know you're lying. It was a blow job if you won, right?"One thing about my man, Rick. Once he got fixated on an idea, he was tenacious. He wasn't going to change his mind now, no matter what I said to him."What does it matter? Blow job or windows, I didn't win the bet, so nothing like that is going to happen. You keep fucking around and talking about things, sure as hell I'm going to end up being fired. If not by Evelyn, then by one of the other bosses who'll find out about what was said in the break.
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