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I've just never met what I always called that special woman."That's because you don't date women that you would want to end up with. I think you're afraid of commitment. We have a lot of nice looking women here at the firm but you have never even dated one of them."I could always talk to Lily as though she was my mom or near best friend. "Lily, I told myself when I started here that I wouldn't date employees. Work place romances can really turn out bad." You're right, but there have been a lot of good ones too. I guess it's how honest you are up front. You're a great guy and a have lot to offer any woman. Try dating the kind of woman you would like to be with and forget about your lounge girlfriends." She smiled at me, knowing I went out with a lot of dancers and a few professional people.I often took escorts to sales events and business dinners. I knew I would never get serious about them. I guess the real fight I was having about dating was with myself.When other people were around. He was my real master. I knew it, and he knew it. And I had committed a grave sin. I have violated our agreement. And I honestly feared that it could cost me my marriage. Why had I been so stupid? How could I have let Jim down so badly? Why was I so susceptible to being seduced by this woman on-line, a woman I would never meet? Why did I obey her in defiance of my husband’s instructions and rules? A man I loved, adored and respected? I wrestled with how to handle this with Jim as I my plane traveled from Chicago the next morning to my hometown. I knew I needed to tell Jim everything, even if it meant the end of my marriage. Being open and honest with my husband was that important to me. I just did not know how I could ever tell Jim about what happened. But I knew I needed to do just that. I just did not know how. I lay there in bed that evening and decided that the longer I put this off, the worse it would be. “Jim, I have to tell you something, and I don’t think you will like it.”.
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