"You could lubricate the plug with... that musclesoothing cream we have in the medicine cabinet. I know that if you getit on any sensitive membranes like... internal areas... it burnsawfully." So you want me to give the butt plug a thick coating of that stuff andthen ram it up your bung, so it will stretch you out painfully and causeexcruciating burning sensations that will go on and on. Is that whatyou're telling me?" Yes, Ma'am. Please do it, Ms. Charlotte."She said to the room in general, "You heard our sick sissy. She wantsme to do all that to her. And though she didn't mention it, I assumeshe'll run and fetch the spoon, the plug, and that cream that's supposedto be for external use only." She sneered at him. "Okay, Miss PrissySissybits?"He sniffled and put on a false smile. "Yes, Ma'am. Thank you so much."Off he went, to gather the implements of his discipline. When he gotback and laid them out neatly on the coffee table, Charlotte wanted toknow, "To make this even. “One thing you have to remember is that no single human can possibly read all the crap that comes through your office. It’s written by lawyers, for lawyers, and it would take way beyond twenty-four hours a day to actually go through the mountain of shit that is a single bill. Nobody expects you to read this stuff. That’s what some of your staff does. They sort through it, figure out if it’s what you want, and tell you what you think about it. Even more of this goes on at the committee level.”I raised an eyebrow at that. “So, if I was being cynical and unscrupulous, and I wanted to screw around with a bill, why bother with the Congressman, just go after the staff.”“I knew you’d catch on eventually,” he replied, smiling.“What else do they do?”We spent the rest of the afternoon discussing staff members. There was the Chief of Staff who ran it all. Maybe an Assistant Chief of Staff, but that might be more for the Senators. A Press Secretary to tell the world what a fantastic job I was.
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