Haseen Mami
Bette Jean wondered if her own face showed such illness.For the fourth time that day, Bette Jean bathed her body that she'd come to think of as a traitor, the villainous traitor of herself. It was as if the constant bathing might speed the forgetfulness and absolution she needed so desperately. The sheets felt cool and icy against her naked skin. Lester would be coming to bed and he hated nightgowns. She would submit to whatever he wanted, willingly. He'd looked startled and displeased when she'd whispered to him that his things were back in their room... that she didn't want separate bedrooms anymore... in fact, he'd looked almost guilty. But his guilt, whatever it might be, could not compare with hers. She waited almost eagerly, the cold sheet hardening her nipples.The neighborhood noises had stopped altogether and a pervading stillness enclosed the house. She lay rigid, naked and still, a small lamp making a pool of light to guide Lester to bed. Her eyes were open and staring,. If it wasn’t technically possible or there wasn’t enough interest to make it financially viable, then the local urgent care or hospital would be happy to have an experienced nurse like her join their ranks. I wasn’t sure if this would be good for me or not. Horses and ponies would keep the grass cropped short, but what other chores would I have to do in order to compensate. Shoveling horse poop sounded smelly and a lot more physical than mowing grass. Plus I’m sure there would be other chores that would land on my shoulders.Another big change for me would be that I had been able to walk to middle school, which had been only a couple of blocks over. Now the high school was several miles away, there was a bus that would pick the students up, but I would need to walk to the next intersection in order to catch it.We had looked into whether getting a taxi to school would be more practical. But my parents initially wanted me to catch the bus in order to not alienate myself from my peers,.
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