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“I only want to do it so everyone knows how much I love you. It wouldn’t be as much fun if people didn’t know it was me – and you. Oh well. Maybe someday the world’s sensibilities won’t be so Puritanical. It’ll give me something to look forward to.”It was more than a week later when Phil and Hailey pulled into the driveway of his parents’ home in SouthPointe. Beth and David greeted both with hugs and ushered them to the couch in the living room. Beth noticed that Hailey sat so close to her son that they were almost sharing skin.“I take it you had a good time,” she said with a broad smile.“It was amazing!” Hailey said enthusiastically. “You have to go down there. You will love it. We walked on the beach of the mornings and watched the sun rise from our balcony. It was so cool. I mean, just to watch it come up over the ocean was the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen. We went to a waterpark one afternoon; we played tennis and Phil took me golfing. Oh, and we went dancing at some really. .. Mary...”“Is that you, Fred?”“Yes, I’ve come back like we agreed.”“What’s it like?”“Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast, off to the golf course, I have sex. I bathe in the sun, then I have sex twice. I have lunch, another romp around the golf course, then sex pretty much all afternoon. After supper, golf course again. Then I have sex until late at night. The next day it starts again.”“Oh, Fred, you surely must be in heaven.”“Not exactly, I’m a rabbit on a golf course in Des Moines, Iowa.”Lexus LS400A woman bought a new Lexus LS 400. She returned it to the dealer the next day, complaining that she couldn’t figure out how the radio worked. The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated.“Watch this!” he said... “Nelson!”The radio replied, “Ricky or Willie?”“Willie!” he continued, and “On The Road Again” came from the speakers.The woman drove away happy, and for the next few days, every time she’d say, “Beethoven”, she’d get beautiful classical music,.
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