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In other words, the perfect real-life simulation of 4chan. I was more hoping for something less tawdry, perhaps wishing that one of the less humor-impaired Others could abuse this antiquated toy technology more effectively, like using more diabolical cassettes and programming to have these one hundred or more teddy’s all open their eyes and tell us the end is near and they’re coming for our souls. Instead, I think they were merely channeling bad street theater, and via a wonky AM radio connection.We weren’t impressed, and we started to get impatient for something interesting to actually happen.“Love, you’re a fairy now, right? One of the Fae, by adoption anyway, so can you magically sense the Goat and find something for me. Dads, my father’s old cassette case that I used to keep under the seat of the Little Red Roller Skate. For sentiment, I moved it under the driver’s seat of the Goat, right next to our CD cases. Can you sense and find it ... and bring it right here to us?”I’d been. There’s rent. And don’t even ask how much a law library costs to keep current. I won’t be able to break even if you take a quarter of my revenue.”“Think how much more money would be coming in if you knew the weaknesses in your opponent’s cases. What if you knew the other side’s best offer in a negotiation? Will you win more cases if you know which jurors hate scum-sucking trial lawyers?”“I would make a lot more money. Can you really do those things?”“Didn’t I already demonstrate my skills to you on Monday? Okay. One more time. Think of something you really wouldn’t want anyone else to know about ... What is barratry?”Jerry looked down.“It’s when you hire someone to chase your ambulances for you.”“But you stopped doing it?”“I use TV commercials now. They bring in plenty of potential clients. We sift through them and take the more profitable cases.”“Unless you need more proof of what I can do, let’s talk about the details of my employment. This is not going to be a full-time job for.
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