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As it was getting late, he invited us both back to his room. Julie came over to me and started shouting into my ear over the music, “So, what are we going to do when we get back there with him? What do you think?” She looked at me, and I could see what she was thinking; there was a little smirk on her face. She said, “You know, we did both fuck Gary last semester – that was a few months apart, but maybe it's not all that different, when you think about it.” It seemed like she was trying to talk herself into it as much as me, but I had to admit that the idea did make my thoughts start racing. So, I nodded; it was decided! When we got back there, Jessie made us all drinks, and it wasn't long before he kissed Julie, and then pulled me over and kissed me! He started touching me all over, and Julie was right next to us and was grabbing him from the back and kissing his neck. Clothes kept coming off, piece by piece. I was incredibly turned on – by him touching me, by seeing the incredible. “Paula?” Meredith called out.“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” I said.Tears flooded out with a surge of memory. I wept because I was confused, not because I was unhappy. A flood of emotions swirled around the pressure I felt to be a part of what was going on between Meredith and Nick. Now I was sure they both thought I was some freaked out kid that balled her eyes out whenever she saw someone getting their cock sucked. Fuck! I’m so stupid!“Paula, come on inside. It’s ok baby, let’s go inside and sit down.” Meredith said.She wrapped the towel around me and helped me to my feet. I wept harder as we walked into the house. By the time we had passed the kitchen I was sniffling and wiping at my nose with my towel wrapped arm. I felt 5 years old and utterly stupid. What was wrong with me? The hottest couple in the world had obviously wanted to have me as dessert and I had started bawling like a baby! I felt ashamed, I felt stupid, but worst of all, I felt like there was no way I would ever see.
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