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It was the name she had given my present and I have to admit I was a little put out because I knew she had a relationship with a guy called Ralph a scum pond piece of pure trailer trash doing time in jail for being a public nuisance. He was stupidly pissing on the mayor's flowers right in front of city hall under the influence of too many beers in too short of a time and he expressed no regrets in the courtroom. That earned him a stiff six months in the city jail with no time off for good behavior. I was incensed that "Ralph" was sitting right on top of Doreen's bed and I couldn't even get in the door. The last picture she sent me was a little confusing because a pair of Doreen's pretty thongs was wrapped around Ralph's neck instead of his pretty ribbon. It almost looked like he was kissing the damn things with a devious intent.I had asked Doreen for a pair of her used thongs one night after we had a real good anal session but she told me they were too expensive and she liked them. "Come on lazy," you whispered in my ear, "I have the whole day mapped out." I lay there, slightly shocked, but with a smile on my face and a massive question mark hanging over me. "What the hell has she planned?" I thought. So up I get, all the usual morning stuff and then it's dressed and out. "Sorry," you say, "First we have to do some shopping." oh well, good things come to those who wait. So it's off to the local supermacardo and stock up with all sorts of food. "Picnic," I think, "But where?"Back we go to the villa and you usher me outside. "Go sit by the pool and read a book or something." As if I brought a book! So I wait, and wait, and wait. Then out you come. All changed, smiling, telling me to go get my swimming things on. Then it's into the car and off we go. Just about to pull out the drive and you say "No, silly, the other way." "But that's a dead end." I tell you, but you just look at me. Ok, your the boss, off we go. 5 minutes later the road runs out. "Ok," I say,.
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