The Things I Would Do To Have Her In My Bed

When they moved in she got a job as a personal trainer in the local sports centre where I attend, so I know she is fit and works out.Mark is about 5ft 10, heavyish set, the only way to describe him is ‘your typical football fan’. He does like his football and a drink - they have had a few BBQ’s for the neighbours and he always seems to be the loud, brash type. They have been round my place often for a coffee and a chat, both singly and together, to be honest when Mark comes around I try and get him out after about 30 minutes as all he ever talks about is his work (he works away alot), football and ‘typical bloke stuff’. But when Samantha comes round, she can stay as long as she likes.Over the last couple of years I have seem Samantha out and about at the shops and the sports centre, she always dressed really well no matter where she is going, and have often seen her in the garden sunning herself. Occasionally when she thinks there is no one around, she’ll move right into the corner. Two nuns were shopping at a 7-Eleven store. As they passed by the beer cooler, one nun said to the other, “Wouldn’t a nice cool beer or two taste wonderful on a hot summer evening?” The second nun answered, “Indeed it would, sister, but I would not feel comfortable buying beer, since I am certain it would cause a scene at the checkout stand.” “I can handle that without a problem,” the other nun replied, and she picked up a six-pack and headed for the checkout. The cashier had a surprised look on his face when the two nuns arrived with a six-pack of beer. “We use beer for washing our hair,” the nun said. “Back at the convent, we call it ‘Catholic shampoo.’” Without blinking an eye, the cashier reached under the counter, pulled out a package of pretzel sticks, and placed them in the bag with the beer. He then looked the nun straight in the eye, smiled, and said: “The curlers are on the house.”Compliments of the ‘Shy One’A beautiful young lady had a very nice boyfriend. The boyfriend had.
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