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" But we're privates," says Paddy."You blind, boy?" asks Mick, pointing again at his stripe. "We're LanceCorporals now!"So they have their drink, and pretty soon one of the Army lassies comes up to Mick."You're cute," she says, "and I'd like to date you, but I've got a bad case of gonorrhoea."Mick pulls his friend to the side and whispers, "Paddy, go look in the dictionary and see what Gonorrhoea means. If it's okay, give me the okay sign."So Paddy goes to look it up, comes back, and gives Mick the big Thumbs Up.Three weeks later Mick is laid up in the infirmary with a terrible case of gonorrhoea. Mick says to Paddy, "Why the hell did you give me the thumbs up?" Well Mick, in the dictionary, it say gonorrhoea affects only the privates & we're Lance Corporals now!"These are compliments of JimDISNEYLANDTwo blondes were going to Disneyland. They were driving on the Interstate when they saw the sign that said Disneyland LEFT. They started crying and turned around and went home.FLORIDA OR. The General, also wearing a robe, walked around his private box, joking with the officers in nearby seats.When the girls reached the bottom of the aisle, Charlotte told Kristin and Beth they were to help her in attaching Dana and Patty to the crosses. Dana exclaimed: "What the fuck? I thought those two were supposed to be the goddamned entertainment!"Charlotte fixed her with a hard gaze and whispered: "Shhhh! They are! This is gonna be just like a boxin' card. There's a warm up match, afore the main event, and the two o' y'all are it. Don' try ta fool around here now! Just do as Ah say, or the good doctor over there will have two more ta try out his marvelous toys. Y'all hear me? Alrighty! Now follow me!"Charlotte led the group of women onto the stage and a round of applause greeted them. Charlotte hissed under her breath to them: "Alright, now take off your chador and, whatever y'all do, don't go tryin' ta cover yerselves with yer hands." Following her own advice she quickly began.
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