ASS

Ann was arguing with her mother when the doorbell rang. Opening it, Ann went silent. Clearing her throat Mary said, hello Ann. How are you tonight. Thank goodness you're early, a voice came from the bathroom as Ann's mother came out. I might be coming home later then the other night, she told Mary. That's fine Mary said smiling. Stay out as long as you want. Looking over Mary's shoulder at Ann, she said softly, if I get lucky I might be out all night, then winked.Her mother said, don't you think you should get ready for bed young lady. With a smile Ann said ok and ran to her room.Closing and locking the door it dawned on her. What if she doesn't want to do it again. After making popcorn, Mary sat nervously on the couch. Ann came from her room in her nightgown. What would you like to do tonight, Mary asked. Standing in front of Mary Ann said, can we. Um, you know. What we did the um. Other night, then leaned forward and kissed her. Mary's heart nearly jumped out of her chest. Relived. .. well, I look like one, or at least I look like that weird Leprechaun Notre Dame uses as it team mascot. I don’t smoke a pipe or wear strange green clothing or run around with my fists in the air searching for a fight, but I’m short and my hair is that same orange color and I have what people call a “Leprechaun Beard.”With my beard in that weird pattern, everyone assumes I am trying to look like a Leprechaun, so that’s what they call me. I don’t trim it that way. In fact, I don’t trim it at all. It just grows out looking like that... very quickly. I’ve tried keeping my face smooth-shaven, but– especially since I got married– it grows too quickly and looks scruffy by the end of the day. For some reason, if I let it grow out, it slows down after it gets to the proper length.I would probably get teased even more about my height except my wife is even shorter than I am. Petite doesn’t begin to describe her. She could shop in the children’s section and most of the clothing would look big.
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