Aunty Dance

Nate noticed her shock and ended her assumptions, “We didn’t do anything. I couldn’t. I wanted to but I couldn’t. We talked some and I went home. We met a few more times and he introduced me to a couple other guys. I went to their flat, they came home with me, but we never did more than hug and kiss some. I was attracted to them, but I didn’t have feelings for any of them. I just couldn’t go any further with them and each of them gave up one by one.” Nate looked up at Susan, “I’ve loved women and I am still attracted to women. I am attracted to men, but I’ve only ever had feelings for one.” Nate slowed down his speech saying one word at a time and asked Susan, “What-the-hell-is-wrong-with-me?”“Nate, there’s nothing wrong with you. You’re bisexual hon. You may have loved women in the past but you’ve always had the ability to love a man too and now you’ve fallen in love with Zac. The mess we’re in now is that He just lost the man he loves and you lost your brotha and haven’t grieved.. This is my spine speaking. I follow it like a blind dolphin might follow an alluring dot on his sonic radar. Just that and nothing else is all I cling to. Just a siren’s song for my ears alone, that stands out from cobblestone clatter and unfocused chatter like a fifth wheel fugue harmony, much higher and brighter, but still concealed in a weave on the brink of chaos. I follow the melody, spin, search, scream to get an echo. And there, once again, the voice, calling for me, but mocking with its fleeting presence. I sense nothing but cosmic background hum, I see nothing but the same generic tourist duplicated over and over. There it is again. Scan, scan, stare, where, where… Not here, think outside the box. Outside, I said. Up? Up. I raise my head, find what I was looking for, and I am home. That is the feeling I get when my eyes meet hers. An angel on a balcony in a blue dress, black hair and dimples in her glittering smile. She laughs. I love her. I have no idea why, except that she.
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