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I really appreciate it. But it feels sterile. It often feels like I’m a patient.”I can’t help but feel hurt. I’m doing all these things for her and Ava is still not happy. “I’m sorry Ava, I didn’t realise.” “That’s alright, dad.” “How can I do better?” “I’ve already told you. My best memories with mom are when we did nudist activities together. It felt so free, so light and cosy to be nude together and to cuddle. Now, I’m nude and you’re wearing clothes. It’s almost like you’re a doctor. It feels like you’re on a different level, disconnected from me. I can’t feel the warmth. I need some cuddles and hugs. Especially now that mom’s gone. The wound of her loss is so fresh.” Ava starts sobbing, tears are running down her cheeks. I’m hugging her, holding her, giving her a kiss on her cheek: “Oh, honey.”“Dad, would you mind? You know, cuddle with me again like I did with mom?” I’m tensing up: “Um… you know how difficult that is for me. We cuddled nude before like you wanted and there was. When I reached at the kitchen she was pouring water, her back was towards me. I quickly and quietly closed the kitchen door. I went towards her grabbed her from the back, closed her mouth with one hand so she won’t be able to make any noise. Due to shock or something initially she didn’t move but then started struggling to get free. I somehow managed to hold her. Then I whispered in her ear that I want to have sex with her. I told her that I was prepared to fuck her with or without her permission, so its best that she stops struggling and enjoy whatever is coming next, I thought that by these I would be able to convince her to give herself to me but she kept on struggling. It was getting harder for me to hold her. I told her that no one will know about this and promise her that she can ask any sexual favours from me she want.I told her she could ask me to fulfil any sexual fantasies she had that she couldn’t tell her husband. But nothing worked, now I got scared, I never thought I.
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