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Ohhh. Ohhh. Pathetic. So, to the letter: Dear Cummy Cunny,For the past five years, my life has been blissful and all because of Trevor. He is my night, my day, my sun, my moon, my stars, my firmament. He is my morning and my evening, my waking and my sleep, my (no, that's quite enough, any more of that and I'm going to vomit; babble, babble, nonsense, nonsense, sickening shit, ahhh). He is an Interphase Production Facilitator with a well-known national Resource Interruption Specialist. It's a really good job and I'm really, really lucky to be with someone who is a bona fide middle manager. Admittedly, he spends a lot of time on the road and the travel can be a bit much, but he does get a company petrol card and a mileage allowance (apparently, nobody gets company cars anymore unless they're SM2 or above because they're benefits in kind and just aren't tax-efficient). His base salary isn't great but there is lots of potential upflow in his salary band and with the performance bonuses,. I went to sleep that night dreaming of the pleasure I might feel.Throughout the day, many members congradulated me on my coming of age. By sundown, the celebration had began. So far, everything rumored was true. I was celebrated with flowers all around me and fern crowns all over the table. We feasted on a large hog. A basket was given to me, and as attendants left, they congratulated me and placed a fruit in my basket. Once the last attendant left, Chief Onsen began to sing. As he sang, the rest of the council cleaned off the table and placed a linen atop it. An older, woman council member approached me with a box, and inside was a long, smooth stone. Once I grabbed the stone, Chief Onson stopped singing. "We were given the gift of life and also given the gift to bring about another life. As we bring forth another being, we are allowed to feel incomprehsible pleasure. It is a privilege to be allowed both this beautiful feeling, and the ability to bring life with it. As you come of.
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