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My barrack room reflects me - a comfortable mixture of soldier andwoman. Amongst all the camouflaged combat kit to keep me alive and theleast uncomfortable in the government's next war zone, is my make-up,flowing clothes and jewellery. After a day wrestling green, Army shitand the incisive semi-insanity of our branch of the military many ofthe girls spend time comparing notes on make-up and fashion; sometimeswe do each other's nails and hair. It's never what you would reallycall girly, unless you're Box or the RSM, but a pleasant change fromwork. Or I'll just haul on some leggings, a loose pullover and someflip-flops to shuffle over the NAAFI for pool and a couple of bottleswith Box. My choice now - happy days.However, this particular Saturday I prepare as carefully as if I weregoing out on exercise for a couple of weeks. Tonight I am having dinnerat Mark's cottage on the edge of the big farm he runs with his parents.Tonight, after he cooks up something to impress with me, I'm having. ."I started blubbering again. She did the 'there, there', adding 'hush'every so often. Finally I got the crying under control. Oddly enough, Ifelt better."Mom, I don't know what's wrong with me. Maybe it's the growing-up thing,but I feel all out of sorts and having weird thoughts." Well, it's all part of being a teenager. You just turned fourteen alittle while ago so it's all so new." I don't think it's that. I think it's ..." How could I put it? "I thinkit might be something more. But I don't want to tell you until ...well,until a little while longer." I understand. I remember this time, being your age," she said, smiling."Dimly, of course, because I'm so ancient!" she teased."You are not ancient!" I retorted. "You are just about the prettiest momever! I love that you're so ...well, so you." Why, thank you, Chris, and I love you, too. Now try to be brave aboutCraig leaving."***I don't know what she thought about our little talk. Did she think I wasa normal boy dealing with being.
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